LMFAO Friday ~ The Dumb-ass Free Weekend Edition

I know, y'all think I'm hideous for talking about the step-son that way. But I have two saving factors. First of all, if the kid was actually an idiot I'd be less pissed, but I have major issues with people who actually possess finely functioning brains that refuse to use them and basically spend their days acting like dumb-asses. It irks me. (not to be confused with pre-coffee dumb assness, or the occasional dumb-ass day) And secondly, I have said pretty much everything that I've said to you to my husband, (and in a much kinder way, to the kid himself) so it's not like I'm talking behind anyone's back.

Like when I tell y'all that I honest and for truly didn't know that it was Friday till half an hour ago because Dumb-ass turned my calendar back to July for whatever dumb-ass reason he had and with hubby not working, I have lost track of days without looking at my calendar. Luckily for him, he left yesterday morning to go back to his mother's (you heard the Hallelujah Chorus, right?) which explains how I'm still a free woman and how he's not dead.

Alrightey then, with that said, let's get to it cause I hate running late to begin with... *grumbleFuckergrumble*

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I know women go to the bathroom in packs, but this is ridiculous.




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Because obviously, terrorists would never break the rules and drive off the paved road...




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If they won't give me a penis, I'll make my own! I mean what were they thinking, there's a knock-off Venus de Milo over there!




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What insurance company wouldn't be thrilled to see this?




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Sweetie, I know we just finished watching Temple of Doom, but that is not snake surprise.




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...and next up, our keynote speaker for the annual Shoplifters United convention...




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Hell, Lucy had a sturdier psychiatric help stand for Charlie Brown.




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...right... next up, PooPoo Splash Court. because the developer let his 2 year old name the streets. Down the way is Red Ball Road and Yellow Slide Place...




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Ahhh, marketing to single mothers, I see.




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Cliff was overwhelmed with returns this week...




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Would Dr. Oz call this an unhealthy bowel movement, even if it saves lives?




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In his defense, Jim was only supposed to be entered in the pasty and under-developed category.




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That Sam, always out to prove he was the stud of the class...




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Kim Jong Il didn't let Clinton into his bedroom...




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This is why everything that used to be made in Taiwan is now made in China.




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Is it totally wrong that my first thought was to enter with the step-son?