Some of them after a lot of thought and consideration.
Some of them simply smack me in the skull while I'm washing dishes or playing Bejeweled Blitz; which mentally are the same thing~ a task to focus the surface mind while the inner mind can run free-range unchecked and give you answers you've been searching for... even if you didn't know you were searching for them.
Long ago and far away I would have smoked pot for that mental state.
I'm glad I finally found the upside to washing dishes... aside from a lack of insect & vermin and the ability to eat off of or drink out of whatever I want to without fear of contracting hepatitis or some other equally gnarly disease.
It almost makes me enjoy doing them now...Almost.
Yeah, not really.
Like last week when I realized why most marriages split up.
If you're in a relationship, envision this: If you were completely financially set, and for the rest of your natural born life you had on call for any time or place; a maid, a chef, a hooker (male or female), a nanny, and a nurse... would you still be with the person you are with?
The amount of time it takes to get to an answer is unimportant, but if the answer is, "No." then the relationship has an expiration date.
The one that hit me this morning was a little bit uncomfortable and less global. Upon seeing pictures a friend posted on facebook, I came to the realization that this person never really liked 'me' but I was convenient and tolerable.
And I wondered how many friendships I've had like that over the years. Where I really enjoyed someone's company and thought of them as a friend, but given the choice and other options, that person would have chosen to hang-out with someone else.
So while I can be cool with that person now, I definitely am not going to bend over backward to make contact, keep contact, or consider him or her in any of my decision making processes.
God called me for other things. I have the personality I have for a reason and it's being put to good use elsewhere. Expending my precious energy on this (or any) person who is a casual acquaintance at best, and who has no desire to deepen the relationship beyond that, is a waste. And continuing to do it is a roadblock in my own personal advancement along my path.
Another revelation I came to when talking with my sister last night was how COMPLETELY GRATEFUL I am for unanswered prayers.
How different would my life, or yours for that matter, be if I had been given some of the things, or relationships, or the situations that I had asked for?
I shudder to think. I thought about a few of them and scared myself so much I had nightmares!
OK, not really, but I should have.
So see, Bejeweled Blitz is a THERAPY TOOL, not a waste of time!
*shut up right now about the dishes, wiseass!*