Myyy House

Come over to My House (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Myyy house is a very, very, very fine house *fine house*......

No cats in the yard though... because we have a house full already.

One amazing, hard-working, super social, Superdad Man. One amazing, hard-working, kind of OCD, NotEvenCloseToSupermom Woman. Four amazing, super social, GoodGradeAcheiving, athletic, church active teen-agers. And on a part-time basis; one amazing, super curious, JustFlatActive kindergartener... in one house.

We should be a reality show...with some Jerry Springer shit thrown in by the universe.

So, Easter Saturday *c'mon people you know what I mean, try to keep up with the story! My calendars run on real life time. Easter Saturday. Mom's Birthday Monday. Sally's Stageplay Friday...anyway, I digress* I was graced with a day off. 

To top it off... I had off the next Sunday morning.

My first YouDon'tHaveToGetUpAt5amToBeToWorkAt6amSundayMorning in an entire year of working for Timewise...  and my man was home for his first Saturday off in a good minute too.

Just us. How romantic.

I spent it cleaning.

It had reeeeeally gone to pot over spring break. All of the kids were gone for the weekend, and it was time to R E C L A I M  the house. 

For just us. For a day.

Eight and a half hours later: All the used cups, dishes, bowls, and utensils were collected from the far corners of the house, and the kitchen was cleaned down to the last dish, counter, and corner of the floor. The bathrooms were all freshly stocked with toilet paper, towels, and washcloths; they were both swept, mopped, wiped, scrubbed and bleachy smelling. The garbage cans were empty AND replaced to where they had begun the day *a feat around here*. There was no laundry of either the clean or dirty variety on the couch or the floor, and the hardwood floor was swept in its entirety. I washed one load of my work clothes and told laundry mountain to fuck off... cause enough is enough.

My wonderful man fed me well and did all of the run-around errand list; bringing back supplies and sustenance while I was on my HormonallyFueledOCDtearassFrenzy mission to restore our home to rights. We each splurged on a two liter of soda that we liked and knew would be there in the fridge...untouched...until WE finished it and threw it away; and each of us got our own separate, favorite large bag of chips that WE could eat to our heart's content and go back later and eat AGAIN without the bag being empty or disappeared all together. 

Call us selfish.

With five kids, pretty much anything you put down is subject to use and or total removal.

Anything.

I ate Ruffles and drank Coke on my breaks from housework. When I went back to snack on them again that evening after dinner... They were there... just as I'd left them... In my clean house.

It was glorious.

I left for work just as the kids returned home Sunday mid-afternoon. By 12:01 Sunday night, various items were strewn about the clean house...the Ruffles and Coke were gone... reality had returned.

I kept up with the housework through Wednesday mid-morning before I left for work.

Today is Friday.

It should only take me four hours to clean house today.

WHY?!?!?!?!?!?

...because adults see a clean home and think: Oh thank GOD! All I have to do is pick up after myself and it will stay this way. 

...but kids see a clean home and think: Hey, if I've got maid service, I'm making the most of it. She's going to earn her maid-pay today!

I may give up the valiant fight... for a nap.

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